


Queer isn't Always Odd - Pewdiecry

by orphan_account



Category: LGBT community - Fandom, The Late Night Crew, Youtubers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Art School, Alternate Universe - College/University, F/F, F/M, Gaming, M/M, PewdieCry - Freeform, Septiplier - Freeform, YouTube, snund - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-29
Updated: 2019-01-15
Packaged: 2019-09-02 02:52:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 9,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16778158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Cryaotic, Gay Ass, (----) {-----}, whatever you want to call him, he's always there, although you may not notice him. Cry is a shy, queer art student with a drive of creating characters. He's pansexual, with a strong preference for men, not that many people care. Words like "gay" are thrown around commonly, and although you might think it stops in high school, but unfortunately not. Now, there's Felix Kjellberg. Popular, funny, wonderful, straight. Everyone loves him. He had befriended the shy art student when they were younger, and once they got to college, they had no other choice to room together. But here's something about Felix. He hates Cry. Simply because, well, he's pansexual. You got that right, Felix Kjellberg, angel in disguise, is homophobic. Everything about Cry, especially the feminine clothes he wears, Felix hates. He hates how gay they look, he hates how cute they are alone, but most of all, he hates how good Cry looks in them.





	1. Moving In

I twirled a little on the mirror, smiling to myself. I looked damn good.

I carefully brushes my hair out of my face, pushing up my glasses and making sure my makeup looked right, before deciding I looked good enough before grabbing a couple boxes, walking outside and starting to load them onto my friend's truck.

See, I had three other friends already going to this school, since it had other programs besides art, and none of us were heavy packers. Except, maybe me. Actually, yeah, I packed the most stuff out of all of us. It's mostly my clothes, I care far more about my appearance than any of them could ever dream of.

I smiled at my taller friend, who smiled all goofy at me.

"Thanks for helping me Russ!" I thanked, straightening my skirt a little.

"No problem dude!" He cheered softly, Scott soon coming out trying to carry as many boxes as Snake. It wasn't working. I giggled softly to myself, and once we had everything packed up, I carefully climbed into the back seats with Russ, letting Snake and his best friend take the front seat.

I was careful of how I sat, making sure I didn't flash all of my friends by accident. See, as cute as this skirt was, it was one of the few I owned that didn't have a pair of shorts underneath, making it so one wrong move or gust of air could mean my baby blue panties are being showed off to everyone.

I gasped softly as we finally arrived at the school. This place is huge! Well, I mean, duh, it has 5 branches, one for music, one for coding, one for art, of course, one for literature, and one for acting.

You've probably guessed by now, but this is what they call a, "Creative School," a school for kids with particular passions. Snake was taking literature, since, I guess he didn't really have anything else to go into, Russ is studying film production, I'm doing art, as I said before, and Scott is doing a mix of coding and music classes.

Russ was dropped off first, since his dorm were further away than mine, Snake's, and Scott's. Scott and Snake were going to be dorm mates, while I had a mysterious someone as mine.

We all walked into the lobby, actually, I should explain the set up of these places. So, in each dorm building, there's three, one for boys, one for girls, and one for non-binary people and roommate pairs of a boy and a girl. Russ had been assigned to that last one, while the rest of us got the boy's building. Each building has a lobby right when you walk in, with the bathrooms and showers connected to that. The lobby is mostly for people who lost stuff, for getting your keys, and asking for certain toiletries.

There are ten floors in each building, each housing 20 people, assuming everyone has roommates. And even then, the third floor has the study hall, which is basically a library with more tables and computers, and the first floor also has the dining hall connected to it. It's set up like a buffet, and you buy meal vouchers, so every time you get a meal voucher you get a certain amount of food.

We walked up the the desk, me first and the other two behind me. Shit, I hate talking to strangers! The receptionist glanced me up and down, looked confused for a second.

"Ma'am, this is the men's dorms," Shit, shit, shit, shit! He thinks I'm a girl! Oh god, how do I explain this?

Luckily, I didn't have to. Scott stepped up for me, facing the boy intimidatingly.

"Sir, he's a man. And if you have a problem with him dressing like this, then, sorry if this seems rude, but, suck it up! He's not gonna change for you!" He snapped, "Now, his name is (----) {-----}. Give him his room key," He ordered, standing firmly and proudly.

"Oh! I'm sorry sir! You have good friends, by the way. Here... room 2B, to get there go to the third floor and it should be the second room to your right, the only place on that floor there is rooms!" He flashed a bright smile, handing me a key, "You're roommate is already up there. Alright, what are your guys's names?" I started to zone out, gripping the key like my life depended on it. I wonder what my roommate will look like... Is he going to be okay with me...?


	2. Hi, I'm...

I walked quietly up to my room, taking deep breaths. I walked through the hall, glancing at room numbers until I realized I missed mine, backtracking until I found it. I took a deep breath, unlocking the door and dragging my luggage in behind me.

My luggage was a mix of mostly clothing, a few cases of posters, two small ones of makeup, two for my art supplies, and other necessities.

When I saw no roommate I furrowed up my eyebrows, setting some of my stuff on the bed that didn't have clothes thrown on it. On one half of the small bedroom area there was various video game posters, and this guy was obviously into horror games. Maybe I can play some with him, yeah, that'd be fun. There was also a fancy computer set up, with duel monitors, half set up at the desk.

I glanced into the mini-kitchen, smiling when I saw a mop of blonde hair.

"Hi! I'm..." I trailed off when the guy turned around. Oh god. Large nose, slightly tannish skin, perfect stubble, those wonderful blue eyes. Felix Kjellberg. Of course he had to be my roommate.

"Oh... It's you," He said flatly, sending me a harsh glare.

"Hi... Hi Felix," I murmured, grabbing only a couple of my posters. I knew the rest would make him mad.

See, in middle school and the first two years of high school, Felix and I were best friends on Earth. That was, until I came out. I told him about how I had been struggling with my sexuality for a while, and that I liked him. That was a mistake.

From there we stopped being friends and he befriended some of the football team, and they made my life hell. I hung out mostly with Snake, Scott, and Russ again, and they were able to protect me for the most part, but that meant they got picked on too. Just because of our sexuality. It's just plain stupid.

The bullying got worse when I started wearing girl's clothes. My sister wanted to get rid of a lot of hers, so I took it, and I loved it. I loved the way I looked, how it felt. I mean, I'm not a girl, I don't feel like I am, I feel like a boy, but I do love women's clothing, even underwear. They made fun of me relentlessly, and when I was alone int he bathroom with them... Well, Felix wasn't there, but they had lifted up my skirt and... Yeah.

Of course, Scott came in at the right time, ran to get Snake, and they both beat the shit out of them. That made me feel a little better.

"Hey, wake up, idiot! I was talking to you," Felix snapped. I shot up, my eyes wide and scared. He sighed deeply, holding the bridge of his nose as if he was irritated. II whimpered softly, looking down at my feet. I'm just useless, aren't I?

See, y'know how I mentioned before that I liked him? Well, yeah, it was more than like. That sounds very childish, I know, but it's the only way I can think to put it lightly. I have fallen head over heels in love, with a homophobic guy that hates me. Great move there, Cry.

"Alright, listen. We're stuck together. I'll mind my own damn business, as long as you mind yours. We have to set up some rules," Felix started, looking just like he did in high school. I hates that his accent still made my knees weak.

"You can have friends over once a month, okay?" He asked, talking slow like I was an idiot.

"Ok..." I whispered, sitting down on my bed.

"Alright, and don't talk to me unless it's an emergency. Now, I need to go," He walked off before I could say anything, leaving me with my thoughts.

I grabbed my drawing tablet, a stand alone I was lucky to afford, and started doodling. I didn't know how I ended up doing it, but I started sketching Felix. His shaggy, yet neat blonde hair, his trimmed stubble, his nose, everything about him. I didn't even now why.

I started on the lineart, and before I had realized anything, hours had passed and I was finishing up the shading.

"You're kinda a creep, y'know," Felix's Swedish voice commented, looking over my shoulder. I nearly shit myself.

"WHAT!? What are you talking about?!" I scrambled, holding my tablet close to my chest, so he couldn't see.

"Drawing your roommate and long time enemy? You're a weird dude- sorry, _lady_ _,_ (----)," He smirked at me, and I squirmed a tiny bit.

"It's not you!" I snapped, "It's one of my characters! Not every blonde-haired, blue eyes guy is you!" I insisted, trying to save myself. I knew my red face gave me away though.

"Sure. Whatever," He muttered, flopping on the bed. I sighed, grabbing my phone and starting to text Scott.

We agreed to meet up at a coffee shop tomorrow, and I promptly shut off the lights, not caring much that I hadn't eaten since breakfast, and cuddling into the sheets.


	3. A Drunk Man's Words is a Sober Man's Thoughts

It was a few months later, and I had slowly gotten more used to Felix being around. My friends and I rarely met up at our dorm, but he threw frequent parties filled with gross, drunk guys that thought I was a girl. I was very upset about it, but they intimidated me. Like, a lot. I rarely spoke to Felix, and I tended to avoid him.

Anyway, he went out tonight, so I had invited my friends over. I honestly didn't realize it was getting so late, but pretty the door burst open, causing me to jump into Scott's arms, who jumped at Snake. It was like a clinging train.

"Felix! Hi!" I stuttered a little too loudly, slowly removing myself from Scott.

"Hiiiiiiiii, Cryyyy," He slurred, a happy smile on his face as he belly flopped onto my bed with a groan.

"Oh... th-that's my bed. But that's okay, you can... I can just take the couch, whatever." I said softly, brushing it off.

"Aw shit, I'm sorry sweetheart. Can you come help me up?" He asked drunkenly, rolling onto his back. I blushed a little, going over there to help him.

"Y'know, I've always thought you're adorable," he informed, his words crashing together messily.

"Felix, you're drunk." I reminded, carefully lowering him toward his sheets, jumping when he pulled me to his chest.

"C'mon baby, just one night," he purred, rubbing my lower back.

"Felix!" I squirmed, pushing at his chest.

"Mmmm, c'mon sweetheart, just one niiiighhhtttt~" He whispered, holding me tighter. I sighed deeply, giving up and glancing at my friends sympathetically. Scott was still clinging desperately to Snake, his cheek pressed against his side.

"Youguys are cute," Felix slurred, pressing his face into my hair. I blushed a bit more, sinking further into Felix's chest. Scott immediately let go, blushing brightly and starting to yell a little.

"Shut up!" His voice cracked, making Felix start to laugh like an idiot.

"Heheheheh~ ehhhh~ Cryyyy~ You cuutttttte~" He stumbled, squeezing my waist happily.

"Felix, you should let go..." I mumbled, glancing at my friends again.

"We should all go back," Snake said, getting up. Scott soon followed, helping Russ up as well.

I looked at them with panic in my eyes, pushing on Felix's chest again.

"Good luck Cry!" Russ waved, flipping me off before promptly leaving.

I looked up at Felix, who started kissing at me desperately.

"Felix!" I pushed him, prompting him to shush me softly.

"It's oh baby, I'm not gonna do anything if you don't wan' me too, bu' I wan' show you love~" He purred, kissing at me some more. I blushed a little more, relaxing a little.

"Y'know sweetheart, I w's bein' serious when I tol' you zat I thought you were cute," He whispered, his breath smelling like alcohol, "I love you a who' lot, kI hope ya know thhhhat," He told me, and he sounded so sincere I almost believed him.

"Ugh, what is this? Some kind of prank? Let me guess, you're recording that and you're gonna show your friends, huh?" I spat, squirmed. His face immediately fell, looking me straight in the eyes.

"baby, I'm so sorr' tat zhat's y'r view of me..." He mumbled, nearly tearing up. It made me feel terrible.

"I sweeear, I don' wann' hur' you no more, I juzt... When we were in high school, m' par'nts 'ere so mean, I thhhought I was right. I'm sorry, baby..." He mumbled, drifting off. I felt like my heart was shattering, wishing he was being honest. But, he was drunk, that can't be true, can it?

"...I love you too, Fe," I whispered, letting myself slowly drift off on his stomach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aww sheet, two uploads in a day?  
> fuck yeah.


	4. I Hate...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there will be the f-word in this chapter, not like, fuck, but the other one. Y'know, the homophobic one  
> Sorry if it makes anyone uncomfortable, heck, it makes me uncomfortable, but I really want to get Felix's views across :/

I yawned softly, gripping my pillow tightly. Mmm, it's warm...

"What the shit!? Hey, fag, get the fuck off me!" A voice suddenly snapped, my pillow sitting up and pushing me off it.

"Wh-- what?" I mumbled unintelligibly, rubbing my eyes before opening them to reveal a very upset Felix.

"What the fuck did you do to me, huh!? Did you fucking molest me!?" He shouted, standing over me threateningly. I paused for a second, trying to remember what happened last night that would make him think that. Then, it hit me. He was drunk as hell when he came home. He probably doesn't remember shit. And, I was laying in his bed with him. It's only reasonable to think something happened.

"W-Wait, Felix, I d-didn't do anything I swear! You came home drunk a-and insisted th-that I stay with you w-when I helped you t-to bed," I frantically explained, sitting up on the floor.

"BULLSHIT!" He roared, "I swear I'll report you to the school for this! Let's see how you do when you're fucking expelled, huh!?"

"N-No! I swwear I did nothing!" I whimpered, starting to hyperventilate. Shit, no, not now! I can't have a panic attack now!

"Prove it," He hissed.

"Sc-Scott and Snake and R-Russ were there, th-they can be ww-witnesses..." I whispered, scared he would start yelling again.

It felt like my throat was closing up, and tears were biting at the edge of my eyes. It felt like a goddamn dragon was breathing fire on my heart, ripping it apart, and pissing on it.

"Whatever," he grunted, grabbing his sweatshirt that was laid by the door and leaving quickly.

I whined to myself, wiping my eyes and taking a few deep breaths. Close one. If that had gone on for too long I would have had a meltdown.

I grabbed my phone, dialing the first number I thought of. Scott's number.

 _"Cry? Hey dude, what's up?"_ His tired voice grumbled through the phone, soon followed by a yawn.

"I-I'm sorry if I woke you up..." I whispered, straightening my skirt.

 _"Dude? You okay? It sounds like you've been crying... What happened!?"_ He seemed to catch on, voice sharpening in that protective way it does when someone does anything to me. It was oddly comforting, having someone as constant as Scott in my life.

"F-Felix..." I whispered, knowing it was all I had to say, not to mention if I said any more I would have a breakdown.

 _"What did he do, Cry?"_ His voice softened a little, _"Do you need me to come over?"_

"Y-Yes please..."

 **"Scott? Who are you talking to?"** Snake's voice rumbled, sounding awkwardly close, like they were in the same bed...

 _"It's Cry, shut up,"_ Scott replied, pulling away from the phone a little.

"Why is Snake there?" I asked softly.

 _"Uh, we're roommates, dude,"_ He said nervously.

"Ok, man. B-But... Can you come over?" I asked once more, feeling my throat try and close off again.

 _"Yeah. I'll bring Snake over too, how 'bout that? We're still... in our pajamas, sow we'll get there in like, 30 minutes."_ He said, pausing as if he didn't know if they were actually in pajamas or not.

"Thank you..." I whispered, "I-I love you Scott," I uttered the phrase we had said many times. It was normal by now, although it may not seem like it. We often only said it when someone was upset, or we just wanted to, it was almost like it was a relationship, but we said it to everyone in our friend group. We had been together for so long now, as friends, it seemed natural.

 _"Love you too, man,"_ He said without hesitation, hanging up.

I took a deep breath, pulling my phone away and tossing it onto my bed.


	5. A Friend In Need

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woah, a slightly longer than average chapter? I feel accomplished.

I jumped as I heard the door open. I thought it was Felix, coming with his friends to beat the shit out of me. Luckily, it was only Scott, soon followed by Snake.

It was obvious they had only recently woken up, with Snake's "shirt" only being a tank-top, and Scott's hair was a wreck.

"Cry? You okay?" Scott spoke softly, sitting down next to me. I practically threw myself at him, hiding in his stomach and whimpering loudly.

"Shhh, you're okay," He whispered, rubbing the back of my head gently. Snake sat down beside him, his arm behind Scott's back. He placed a hand on my back as I sniffled, gripping onto Scott's hoodie like my life depended on it.

"Russ is gonna be here in a minute, and then we'll make you something to eat, okay?" Scott mumbled, still holding me.

Once Russ arrived Snake got up to let him sit next to me, and I was now sitting in his lap, still in my pajama pants, while Scott made me breakfast. He wasn't an amazing cook, but he was the best of all of us.

"I'm gonna head out for a minute," Snake informed, walking toward the door.

"Aww, why?" Scott pouted.

"You'll see, Colonel," He dismissed it, shutting the door behind him.

I wiped my eyes and sniffled as Scott started to split the french toast and bacon onto three plates, one for me, one for Russ, and one for Snake when he gets back. He put two of the plates in front of me and Russ, leaving the other on the counter as he scoured Felix and mine's pantry. He grabbed the syrup, tossing it on the floor near us, before grabbing something else, something I quickly identified as the gluten free cracker things Felix kept buying.

"Th-That's Felix's," I whimpered, slipping off Russ's lap so we can both eat.

"Yeah, he gets to suck it up," Scott said boldly, opening it after reading the ingredients.

"You're gonna get the shit beaten out of you," Russ warned, mouth full of bacon.

"My boy-- _best_ friend is a 6"2 man that works out at least once a week, if Felix lays a hand on me he gets the shit beaten out of him," Scott retaliated, "And don't talk while you chew!"

"Okay, _mooommmm,_ " Russ teased, swallowing.

"Fuck you dude," Scott cursed, eating.

I smiled and sniffled at my friends, getting up and putting my empty plate in the sink. I walked over to my closet, opening it and smiling at the clothing inside.

I looked over all of them thoroughly, eventually selecting a pink skirt and a lacy tank-top crop-top. I knelt down to the drawers, grabbing a nice pair of white underwear, to match my top, and threw it all on the bed.

"Alright nerds, either leave or look away, I'm changing," I informed, grabbing my panties first.

Russ laughed and went into the kitchen where he couldn't see, while Scott smiled and simply turned away.

I don't care much if Scott sees me. It's nothing sexual, just that we would never have a relationship. As much as he hates to admit it, whenever it comes to relationships with other boys, we both bottom.

I took off my pants and panties from the night before, slipping on the white lace. I grabbed the skirt, pulling it up to my waist. This particular skirt happened to be high waisted. I put on the crop top, letting it cling to my chest and make it look a tiny bit like I had cleavage. I twirled a little, letting the skirt move.

I smiled at my appearance, I looked great, but something seemed missing. I glanced over at my little box filled with necklaces and bracelets. I grabbed a few bracelets, one was like a little white and black cat wrapping around your wrist, one just plain rubber, and the other few little gold ringlets. I also looked over my necklaces, eventually grabbing a choker that had a little gold kitty charm on a black leather band.

"Alright, you guys can look now," I informed, remembering that I had forgotten to tell them.

Russ came out of the kitchen without his plate, glancing at my clothing choice.

"Damn! You really do look like a girl!" He teased, smiling brightly.

"Shut the fuck up, Russ," Scott ordered, jumping a little and smiling when the door opened to reveal Snake. His smile quickly fell though.

Snake's lip was busted, a little bit of blood on his chin, and his arm was bruising.

"Snake! What happened!?" Scott asked, almost like a concerned boyfriend. The though would have made me snicker if it weren't for my hurt friend.

"Nothing, don't worry about it, Colonel," He grunted, wiping off his lip.

Scott's eyebrows furrowed up, and it was obvious he was just about done in that moment.

"David," He snapped, making Snake glare. Never would have guessed Snake would have the same name as Snake. What?

"Tell me what happened," Scott asserted, standing up.

" _Nothing,_ " Snake growled, standing with his shoulders out wide. Scott looked minuscule in front of him, no matter how tall he tried to make himself seem.

"Bullshit," Scott spat.

"None of your business, Scott," Snake spoke coldly, using Scott's real name instead of his nickname, for once.

"Just tell me! If it's not a big deal it won't matter if I know!" Scott insisted, not wavering one bit. In that moment I was slightly worried Snake would club his face in, he looked pissed. Snake pissed isn't necessarily fun.

"Fine!" Snake's voice rose above a normal speaking voice, and I swear, I almost shit myself, and I was surprised Scott was still standing there like a disappointed mother.

"I went out to talk some sense into Felix, and he tried to beat me up," He grumbled.

"Snake, you're an idiot," Scott informed, before sighing, "Now, c'mon, I'm gonna fix up your lip a little.

"You don't have to do that," Snake mumbled, a tiny bit of red on his face. He was probably surprised Scott forgave him so fast.

"I want to," Scott insisted, taking Snake's hand and leading him to the bathroom, before closing the door.

I shook my head in disbelief, looking open-mouth at Russ.

"Holy shit, I thought Snake was gonna kill Scott," He mumbled, and I silently agreed.

Note to self, never make Snake angry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, no, Snake's name isn't David. That's Solid Snake's name, and I think it's funny to call Snake that.


	6. A Peaceful Walk

I was taking a quiet walk, away from everyone. Away from Cry.

We used to be best friends, stuck together through thick and thin, but then... Well, he came out. He told me that he has the capacity to love everyone, and, he chose me. He fell in love, with me.

At the time I was confused, so I went to my parents. I told them that I had a friend that liked boys and girls, but I think they only really heard the first part.

They told me that what he was doing was wrong and sinful, and if I supported him, I would go to hell with him. Of course, as a little innocent middle schooler, the thought terrified me. The next day I avoided him, and when he came to close, I started yelling.

_"GO AWAY! YOU'RE GONNA GO TO HELL! I DON'T WANNA GO DOWN WITH YOU, YOU FREAK!"_

The thought made me shudder. Of course, since then I thought it through for myself, but by the time I decided that my parents were spewing bullshit, it was too late. If I apologized, I would have no friends left. I would be bullied and picked on relentlessly.

Then, I started thinking more, and I realized I had the same problem as Cry. I... liked boys and girls. I was bisexual. Of course, I hadn't come out to anyone but myself, but I would love to someday. I just have to wait until my parents either disown me or realize how wrong they are.

I was snapped out of my thoughts by a gruff voice, grunting out my name.

I turned around to see one of Cry's friends, I think his name is Snake, jogging toward me.

"What the hell," He growled, glaring down at me.

"What??" I put on a tough face, knowing that if I didn't, someone was bound to see.

"You _know_ how anxious Cry gets, why the living fuck you yell at him?" He growled once more, his face honest to god looking like he was ready to murder me.

"W-Whatever dude," I brushed it off, but inside I started to beat myself up. Cry probably had a fucking panic attack! God, I shouldn't have done that. I reacted so quickly, but honest to god, I remember everything from last night. I was barely even drunk.

"No, you need to go back to your guys's dorm and apologize," He demanded, glaring into my soul.

"W-- Fuck that!" I pushed him, but he barely moved, if anything, I was the one that moved more. I only made him angry.

He grabbed my shirt collar, lifting me off the ground a tiny bit, and I'm probably lucky he didn't do more.

"Go back, and apologize," He demanded lowly. I punched him and hand as I could in the arm, and he quickly dropped me. I groaned as I landed on my back weird, but quickly got up. I swung again, this time hitting him in the face. His lip started bleeding a little, but he only sighed and grabbed my collar again, slamming his fist into my face.

I whined softly, my face feeling like it was on fire. I felt my body drop to the ground and heard the soft crunch of him walking away, but didn't bother to move.

Cry has great friends. They defend him at every turn, even when he insists it's fine. Hell, I'm sure they're at out dorm right now, comforting him.

I sighed deeply, getting up and brushing myself off, walking toward the main building. Inside they had all the dorms and who was in them on a little map, well, big map, and I was hoping to find someone I know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dude, I'm already 6 chapters in and have barely even gotten into the plot  
> fuck


	7. Things Mean, well, Things

I yawned deeply, rubbing my eyes as I woke up.

My friends had left after a while last night, telling me to tell them if Felix did anything else.

I carefully pulled myself out of bed, noticing Felix was already gone. He must've either never come back last night or already left to hang out with his friends before classes started tomorrow.

I opened my closet, tugging on the baggy boxers I had worn to bed.

I had a few pairs of boxers, mostly because they're nice to wear to bed. I don't like wearing them around though.

I slowly looked up into the closet, but my heart nearly stopped at what I saw.

I saw nothing.

Nothing. At all.

My once full closet was now completely empty except for a small note on a sticky note, written in messy handwriting.

I picked up the piece of paper, reading carefully, trying to decipher the scribbles.

 _We're burning your clothes fag_ I managed to read, furrowing up my eyebrows.

This wasn't Felix, was it? He wouldn't do this! But he's the only other one with the key to the dorm...

I felt sick to my stomach, tears filling my eyes and dropping onto the yellow note.

I grabbed my phone, texting Scott.

> _Hedude_
> 
> _I nedyou tol bring mesome clothes_

I just couldn't type right through the tears.

Those were hundreds of dollars over years! And they're gone! Burnt!

I let out a loud sob as a notification went off on my phone, prompting me to look down.

> **Why**
> 
> **did smthing happen**
> 
> _ys_
> 
> **what**
> 
> _felix and hisfrends stolet hem and burntthm_
> 
> **holy shit**
> 
> **alright**
> 
> **im coming**

I let out a sigh of relief, wiping my face roughly.

Scott and I were the same size, this should work out fine.

He can lend me some clothes while I get some more.

Yep, it'll all be fine.

I hope.

I shook my head as a knock on the door sounded, prompting me to open it a tiny bit. Upon seeing Scott holding a mass of fabric I pulled him inside, sniffling.

"Alright, how do you know they burnt them?" He soothed, holding my shoulders gently.

I showed him the note, my knees trembling along with my breath.

"Pieces of shit!" He snapped, huffing.

"Alright, here, I brought a few hoodies, some old t-shirts, and some pants. You don't need boxers, do you?" I shook my head, thanking him softly and grabbing one of the skinny jeans he brought.

"I uh, tried to bring the most, y'know, girly clothes I had, since I know you like that stuff," He said, turning around.

I mumbled a thank you, pulling on a red t-shirt and a blue sweatshirt over it.

"You can turn back around," I whimpered, watching my brown-haired friend spin around.

"Hey, you actually look great!" He complimented, but I could tell he was just trying to lift my spirits, "Do you want me to call Snake and Russ?"

I nodded, sitting on my bed.

He probably just texted them, since I didn't hear any talking, but once he put his phone back in his pocket he took a deep breath.

"Alright, you checked your closet, did you check your dresser?" I shook me head, "Alright, I'll do it for you," I heard a few drawers opening, a soft cuss, followed by my friend's voice again, "Alright, they took everything. Everything but your socks that aren't knee-high or pink or anything, and your boxers. How could they do that? We should report them!"

I shook my head. I don't want Felix to be even more angry at me.

"Alright, if you say so," He said with a sigh, sitting next to me.

I whimpered softly, hugging him tightly.

"Thank you," I whispered, feeling his bony arms wrap around me.

"No problem, Cry. You've done just as much for me, without even realizing it, if not more. You've done the same to everyone else too, even Felix. You don't deserve this," He soothed, rubbing my back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I was gone so long! Caught up in reading and writing other fanfiction -~-


	8. Comfort

I heard soft steps before the door creaked open, Russ and Snake standing in the doorway.

I sniffed, wiping my eyes roughly as the bed sank down next to me to support Russ's weight. I felt his hand rest softly on my back, and his voice broke the quiet air.

"Dude, I can't believe he did that. That shit's expensive. That probably cost like, a shit ton," He said, looking over at me. I whined, sniffling softly.

Scott sighed and scooped my head into his arms, cradling in against his chest like my head was his child.

I heard Snake get up, and soon I felt another arm wrap around me.

It was warm and muscular, but nothing like Felix's.

Russ joined too, wrapping his thick arms around my small frame protectively.

The first arm left, and Snake spoke.

"Felix, get out," He growled, and when I looked up, I saw him.

Felix was standing there in the doorway, a look of slight guilt but also confusion on his face.

"What?? Dude, it's my dorm. I didn't do anything," He tried to reason, brushing a hand through his golden, yet sandy hair.

"You know what you did," Scott snapped, tightening his grip on me, but keeping the tenderness of it.

"No, I don't," He argued, fear settling in his adorable blue eyes.

"Bullshit!" Russ nearly yelled, "You fucking went out and burned hundreds, maybe thousands of dollars worth of clothes, and you consider that nothing!?"

"...What? Oh god, I did? It was Cry's clothes, wasn't it? Oh god, Cry, I'm really sorry I swear," He turned to me, his blue eyes slightly glossy and filled with remorse. That was the most sincere I've seen him since middle school.

"What good your sorries are doing him now," Snake grumbled, glaring harshly, "You need to leave. Now."

"I'm sorry Cry," He whimpered, shooting me a sad smile before scurrying away.


	9. Sorries

I was laying in my bed, curled around a pillow. My friends eventually left me alone after I shot down all their ideas for places to go.

I heard the door creaked open softly, and someone sat down on the bed behind me.

I sighed, looking up a little.

There sat Felix, looking at me as if he was trying to judge if I was awake or not.

"Hey," He greeted softly, and I soon felt a soft hand in my hair, playing with my hair. I sighed happily, leaning against it.

He smiled, his eyes brightening a little.

"I really am sorry, I... I got like, really, really, drunk last night, as uh, d-drunk me, is very, impressionable," He said, his face scrunching up again.

"It's okay... I just... You need to pay me back," I said softly, leaning against his leg.

His smile grew until he was practically smiling ear-to-ear, scooping me up into a hug that lifted most of my body off the sheets.

I squeaked, giggling a little.

"Hey, how 'bout after classes tomorrow I take you to the mall so you can buy some stuff? I'll pay!" He suggested, his eyes sparkling.

"It's only 6:00, we can go now," I pointed out, wanting to have a nice outfit for my first day of school, or rather, class.

He nodded softly, smiling at me as he helped me off the bed.

I hugged him softly, and I smiled as Felix squeezed me.

"Hey, I... I... Uh, just so you know I..." He swallowed thickly, "I th-think I'm b-bi," He stuttered a little, looking at me with a red face and a smile.

I smiled back, kissing his cheek quickly. I lead him to to the parking lot, letting him lead me to his car.

I nearly fell asleep driving to the mall, but when we arrived I couldn't push down my excitement.


	10. The Mall

I nearly dragged Felix into the shopping center, still holding his hand. He smiled, rubbing the back of my palm.

I took him into Victoria's Secret first, going straight to the section that I knew had my size. I picked out a nice, lacy pair of blue panties, a pair of pink ones with a bow, and a pair of purple ones with ruffles.

I showed Felix each time, and even though he looked flustered, he kept saying the same thing.

"I know you'll look great in them."

I then went to the bra section, Felix deciding to just wander around instead of going over there.

I only picked out one bra, but it took a while to find one that I liked.

I picked up a few more articles of clothing, like a skirt, a cute pair of shorts and a blouse.

I found Felix again, asking him if he liked everything. He simply shot me a smile, grabbing my hand and taking me to the register. I'll take that as a yes.

The person ringing us up looked a little disturbed, so I cut in with one of my many excuses.

"Our friend is having a birthday party and she's always complaining about her clothes, so we thought we might as well..." I explained, tightening my grip on Felix's hand.

She merely smiled and nodded, muttering a "that's very nice of you" as she handed us our bag.

I scurried out of the store with Felix on my trail, heading to Sophora.

I started to pick out the main makeup items I needed, Felix occasionally suggesting something.

I always got everything he said might look nice.

Once we were finished there, we finally went over to a clothing shop that I went to often.

The workers there all knew who I was and were all very kind to me, not at all bothered by me being a boy.

I went through, grabbing everything I knew I looked cute. It mostly consisted of tank-tops, crop tops, and sweaters.

My favorite tops were this lacy baby-blue crop top, a light pink tank-top, a deep green tank top, and a white fade to purple crop top.

My favorite bottoms, which I bought less of, were these cute, high-waisted short-shorts made of denim, a white short skirt, and a black skirt that fell just above my knees.

Once I had practically raided the entire store, dragging Felix along with me, and putting back some that I didn't like quite as much, we brought them to the counter.

The girl who I knew automatically as Sophie giggled softly at the pile.

She had long, braided blonde hair and deep brown, almost chocolate eyes. Her skin was pale and yet pink, her lips full and yet thin. She could practically be Felix's sister if she had blue eyes.

"Back to school shopping?" She asked lightly, smiling at me.

I laughed a little, tipping my head to the side.

"Kinda, I guess. I kinda had an incident with a friend that resulted in most of my clothes being burst, so I'm borrowing my other friend's clothes while we buy some more!" I explained, and for a second I saw guilt flash across Felix's face.

"Oh my god! Well, that explains it!" She said in disbelief, only making the guilt grow on Felix's face.

I bit my lip, squeezing his hand and opening my mouth to speak up, only to get interrupted.

"So, who's this?" She asked, turning to Felix with a small smile.

"Oh, uh, this is my friend Felix!" I introduced, squeezing again.

He waved softly with a smile, his eyes glimmering like they always do.

"Do you think you'll ever bring that Scott guy back? He was kinda cute," She asked me, her eyes lightening.

I felt my stomach tighten, knowing full well that Scott had the biggest crush on Snake and wasn't going to be dating any girls anytime soon.

"Oh, uh, actually, he has a boyfriend," I bullshitted, knowing Scott would be thankful if he ever met Sophie face to face again.

"Aw, really? Ugh, it's so hard to find boys anywhere even near my height! Cryyyyyyy!" She whined, now packing my new clothes into bags.

"I know, I'm sorry!" I replied, feeling Felix let go of my hand.

I would be worried if it weren't for the fact that directly after I felt his arm loop around my waist gently.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh, so, I actually haven't ever gone to Victoria's Secret or Sophora or anything like that so...


	11. A True Art Student

I walked through the chilling campus, carrying my giant-ass portfolio.

Ah, the first day of classes. Time to stay up until way past midnight working on everything. Fun.

I passed Felix on my way to class, flashing him a bright smile. He returned it happily, his eyes lighting up.

I rushed into my first class, painting, before settling into a random spot in the back of the room.

* * *

I sat at ho-- my dorm, bored as hell. I grabbed my phone, feeling just plain pooped out when it came to my art.

I played around for a while, before I got an idea.

I should dye my hair.

I saw a guy earlier talking to Felix that had bright green hair, and another guy that had red. Of course, they looked like they were trying to grow out their hair to get rid of it, but I still loved the idea.

I quickly went to my messages with Scott, typing quickly.

> _Dude_
> 
> _I need you to bring snake and russ over_
> 
> _i have an idea_
> 
> **what happened**
> 
> _nothing im just bored and want to dye my hair_
> 
> **what color**
> 
> _purple_
> 
> **should i get it or are u going to**
> 
> _i will_

I got up, throwing my sweater back on and running to a small corner shop near by.

By the time I got there I was panting and sweating a little, but I didn't care.

I looked at the list I pulled up on my phone of what I needed, grabbing developer, hair dye, a brush, everything.

I paid for all of it, speed-walking back home.

As I was walking I heard a familiar car pull up. I looked over to see Russ walking out and catching up to me, smiling.

"You're seriously gonna dye your hair purple? Bold move, dude," He said, ruffling my already messy hair.

"Fuck off, there's tons of people in like, all of my classes with even brighter hair," I argued, walking into the dorms.

I unlocked my door for everyone, all of us gathering inside. Felix won't be home for a few hours, since he had later classes than me, so we had plenty of time.

We all read the online instructions, Scott sitting me on the toilet as he started to mix up the developer and stuff.

It smelled strongly of shitty chemicals, and it was a weird milky color, but I just shrugged it off.

I got up to change into an old ratty t-shirt that used to belong to Russ I used as a pajama shirt, sitting in only that and my boxers.

We started to put it in my hair, all of us making snarky comments about the smell.

We waited for a while, before washing it out of my hair, Russ and Scott laughing afterward.

Apparently me with very blonde hair looks like an idiot.

We started on the purple dye, and after about an hour of smearing it in and waiting, we washed it out.

It was a deep galaxy color, surprisingly covering all of my hair.

I smiled, running a hand through the still damp locks.

I fit right in now.


	12. A Tactical Nuke

I sat on the couch with Felix, playing with his switch on the shitty TV.

We were sitting awkwardly close, sharing body heat, but nobody bothered to complain. He hadn't commented on my hair yet, but before he had started playing with it.

I was wearing one of his old shirts, he had given it to me saying he didn't want it, and some boxers I was pretty sure were mine.

I groaned angrily as he beat my character, but I was still ahead.

He started shouted obscenities at me when I knocked him off the map, giving me the match.

He pouted, and, being the overly anxious and empathetic person I am, I put a hand on his back.

He smiled, scooping me into his arms with no warning. I yelped softly, feeling his breath ghost up my neck.

"Mmmm~ You're good at this," He mumbled against my collar bone. I blushed deeply, squirming a tiny bit in his lap.

"Felix?" I asked softly, threading my fingers through his hair.

"Y'know, you look really cute in my boxers. It's almost tempting," He purred softly. I could practically feel my heart skip a beat, my breath catching in my throat.

I felt his fingers trace random patterns on my lower back, dangerously close to the waistband of the boxers that were apparently his.

I yipped softly as his fingers slid underneath but instead of grabbing my ass like I thought or even pulled them down, he just felt across the waistband.

"Mm~ Yep, right there. Property of Felix Kjellberg," He smirked at me, pulling me closer.

"F-Felix, I..." I stuttered, squirming.

"Baby, I can stop," He said softly, looking me in the eyes, "I don't wanna go too far, but if you feel uncomfortable you need to tell me."

"N-No, it's okay," I mumbled, wrapping my arms around his neck gently.

"Alright," He whispered, his breath brushing over my face.

His lips were dangerously, tantalizingly close to mine, his nose brushing against mine.

His hand traveled along my body, touching along my shoulders and shoulder blades, before dipping back down.

In an instant time came to a stop, his hands stopped in the middle of my spine, pushing me forward and effectively eliminating the distance between us.

Our stomachs were flush against each other, his talented lips leading me.

It was like going underwater, the rush of adrenaline that tells you that this is wrong, that humans aren't supposed to do this, the voice in the back of your mind screaming at you that this will only end badly.

But you keep going.

You keep going because you like the fear, you like the rush, the way your heart drops to the bottom of your chest.

I whimpered softly, pulling on his hair.

He groaned into the kiss, rubbing my back gently.

And finally, time resumed. He pulled away slowly, his beautiful blue eyes staring at mine.

He grabbed my glasses, setting them to the side before going in once more.

We couldn't stop, his strong, calloused gamer hands tangling in my purple hair, pulling me closer.

It became a mess of lips and teeth, but we were both so desperate to be close to each other nobody cared.

"I'm gonna take you out to dinner tomorrow, okay?" He asked softly, his hands rubbing along the bottom of my back.

I nodded unintelligibly, pulling him in again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> never though I could make a chapter this long just about people kissing.  
> But I did it.


	13. Dinner Date

I sat at the unfamiliar dorm that smelled distinctly of my friends, sitting on the edge of a bed that looked nearly completely unused.

"Oh, my, god! I can't believe he asked you out! I can't believe you said yes! Holy shit Cry!" Jund rambled, holding his head while he paced.

"he was being really nice..." I mumbled, "Besides, this isn't the time for you to yell at me, you're supposed to help me pick what to wear!"

He sighed, shaking his head before starting to dig through the pile of shirt I brought.

"It's getting cold, so maybe something wool? Why am I helping you again? Ugh, Cry, you're lucky as shit. Here, you can wear this," he threw a knitted loose fitting sweater at me, "With this," he threw an undershirt tank-top. ([link here](http://picture-cdn.wheretoget.it/36hmdo-l-610x610-sweater-casual-light-knit+sweater-light+weight-beige+sweater-beige-creme-cream-white-loose-knitwear-fine+knit+jumper-shirt-blouse--jewels-tank-fashion-style-cardigan.jpg))

I nodded, folding them into my lap and watching as he went to my bottoms.

He threw me a brown skirt with little white stripes on it, buttons on the top. ([this too](https://cdn-img-0.wanelo.com/p/87c/a07/65b/c1fe34dcac4328e236248ab/x354-q80.jpg))

I smiled, grabbing the pair of underwear I bought that Felix said were his favorites. They were these lavender, lacy pair with a bow on the front.

Scott then started to go through my little bin of accessories, grabbing a necklace with a purple gem, and purple gem earrings. ([this](https://aphrodite-store.com/wp-content/uploads/LAYERED-NECKLACE-MOON-AND-NATURAL-STONE-600x600.jpg) and [this](https://www.elegantcostumejewelry.com/images/1488240412114-940854047.jpeg))

He let me put all of it on before grabbing this pair of purple over-the-knee socks I didn't know I owned. ([here](https://www.rocknsocks.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/thumbnail/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/p/u/purplesolidcolorovertheknee.jpg))

I slipped those on a finished it off with a pair of brown slip ons. (no link because they're literally just slip ons)

"Thanks dude!" I smiled at him, trying to make my hair look nice. He nodded in approval of his work, smiling brightly and proudly.

"Snake!" He called into the house, his roommate soon walking over from the kitchen.

"Whddya think?" He asked, spinning me around to show our friend. Snake smirked softly and nodded in approval, shuffling back to the kitchen.

Scott's smile only grew, ushering me out the door, "Go!"

I made my way down to the lobby, where Felix said he'd meet me.

Sure enough, he was standing there, wearing a blue polo and dark grey skinny jeans. He looked goddamn stunning.

I smiled, gripping the brown purse that Scott threw at me as I left, saying that it held "stuff". I can only assume he meant condoms and shit, knowing him. Although, upon peeking inside I saw not only a pack of condoms and lube, but spare makeup in case I needed to touch up.

"C'mon, let's go," He said, laying his arm across my shoulders. I smiled, relaxing at the touch as he lead me outside.

He ended up driving me to this place that made me feel severely under dressed, sitting at a seat that was right up against the wall, a booth barely big enough for two people. That meant, of course, that we were squished together. Only more reason to be close to him.

I felt him wrap an arm around me waist to make more room, showing me the single menu we got.

He ended up ordering some kind of steak with salad while I just ordered chicken and dumpling soup.

We awkwardly chatted for a bit while waiting for our food, his hand slowly slipping lower on my waist until it was practically on my ass.

Once it was, he pulled me close, pressing his lips up against mine. I smiled, grabbing his collar and kissing him harder before pulling away.

"We're in public," I reminded, wiping the bit of lip gloss that stuck to his lips.

He smiled, nodding slightly.

"Oh hey, how's your sister? I haven't seen her in like, forever," He asked, finally settling on a conversation topic.

"Oh, she actually had a baby! She is the cutest damn thing ever, I swear. Ugh, you have to meet her one day! Holy shit!" I rambled, my nervousness suddenly disappearing. He smiled softly, kissing my cheek quickly before he let me continue.

"Her husband is super cool too, and he's ginger. Ginger people are cool. My niece is ginger as well," I continued, his blue eyes scanning me gently.

"And my brother is pissed that he still has to be in school for," I paused to imitate my little brother " _eleven more years! Moooooommmm, why can't I go to college with (--)?"_ Felix laughed softly, his hand now playing his my hair.

"I like your hair by the way. Purple suits you," he complimented, sitting up when the waitress arrived with our food and drink refills.

I had gotten sprite, while Felix had just gotten water.

I spooned the hot, slightly salty broth into my mouth with a smile, before quickly retreating to my cold drink once I felt it burn my tongue.

He smiled brightly, rubbing my waist before letting go of it to eat.

So, the date wasn't that bad after all.


	14. Freak

I walked to practice quietly, smiling to myself.

I finally fucking managed to man the fuck up and tell Cry that I love him.

Thank god.

Anyway, I was at the field now.

It was covered in mud from rain the previous night. Chances are my uniform won't be the pristine yellow this whole time.

I sighed, placing my backpack on one of the bleachers.

I quietly walked toward the group, noticing the coach wasn't there yet. We should probably wait for him.

"Hey, Fe!" I heard one of them call, making my pace pick up to a jog.

"Yeah?" I asked between soft pants to keep my body running.

"Feel like we should change his nickname to fag," One of them muttered.

I furrowed my eyebrows as they all laughed, not finding anything funny.

"Yeah man, why the hell would you start hangin' out with that guy?" Another asked once the chuckles died down.

"Because, he's cool," I said once I realized they were talking about Cry.

"Yeah, with his bright-ass hair. I bet he wears thongs and bras for you to make him look like a girl, huh?" The first teased, snickering.

"He... he doesn't like bras. Stop making fun of him," I tried to assert myself, but my eyes were drawn to the ground.

"What, you really are his boyfriend?"

"Yes!" I snapped, tensing my shoulders.

"He really is a fag!" One of them whispered.

"Hey, man, you're serious? No pranks?"

"No pranks. He's my fucking boyfriend. He also has a penis, and is a man. He is also pansexual, not gay. So stop fucking making fun of him, alright?" I hissed, standing up. Of course, I had to be one of the shortest on the team despite being taller than average.

"You fucked him?" One of them asked. Of course, I hadn't. I had never taken his virginity, although we talked about it a lot. And yes, apparently, he is a virgin. Fuck, he's adorable.

"So what if I did?" I decided, and in an instant I felt hands on my shoulders, and then cold ground on my back.

"Fucking freak!" The first shouted, stumbling away from me as if my sexuality was a disease.

Needless to say, I got the shit beaten out of me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying so hard to avoid writing sport scenes because I don't play any sports whatsoever.


	15. Patch Up

I was busy drawing when I heard the door creak open. I was confused, Felix wasn't supposed to be home for another hour, but when I looked up I felt my heart drop to my chest.

"Felix? Oh my god, what happened?" I scrambled, setting my stand-alone off to the side and rushing over to his.

"Nothing, I just fell," He said, wrapping an arm around me to stop his limp.

"Felix, that looks a lot worse than falling," I informed him, helping him walk to the mini-bathroom to try and patch him up.

"I fell on... the bleachers," He said, wincing as I sat him down on the toilet.

"Oh, god, Felix! Stop lying!" I whined, trying not to cry, "I need you to take off your shirt and pants, I need to see what all happened to you,"

He sighed, throwing his shirt across the room, fumbling with his jeans. I tried not to look at flustered as I was when he asked me to help him pull them off.

I grabbed the first aid kit with a small gulp,setting it down next to the toilet as I sat on my knees in front of him.

"Heh, it kinda looks like you're about to give a blowjob," Felix informed with a little huff of laughter, running a slightly shaky hand through my hair.

"N-Not the time Felix," I said, suppressing a laugh.

"Awww, okay baby," He tried to lean forward to kiss my head but winced and sat back, sighing deeply.

I first started patching up his legs, since they were the closest to me.

They had little cuts and scratches all over them, likely from the coarse dirt of the football field. Of course, I had to first wipe of all the mug smeared on them.

I winced when I saw a bruise in the shape of a foot.

I finished bandaging the parts where the scratches were the worst, spreading disinfectant cream on them as well.

I than got up to reach his stomach, putting numbing cream on the many bruises.

I then patched up his few cuts, trying to focus on that and not the nagging voice in the back of my head.

_This wouldn't have happened if you just kept to yourself. This is your own damn fault. He shouldn't have ever met you._

I gulped thickly as I finished, rushing off to grab him some new clothes and pain relievers.

I handed the stuff to him, scurrying back to my bed to cry myself to sleep.


End file.
